How would you react?

Post by **Mudpout** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:40 pm

I hate to bring this here, but something happened this weekend that has really bothered me, and would luv to hear an opinion.

Last Saterday I invite a friend of a friend to come fishing with me in my boat, this isnt the first time I've brought him along. When he was unemployed, i offered to pay for everything ( gas, lures, even made him a lunch when he had no food). Well FF to this weekend, as we are pulling off the river he asks me if i've seen 2 packs of grubs. i said no but looked through my stuff anyhow. No luck. He then starts storming around and i realize something is up, so i ask what his problems is. Here it comes, this guy accuses me of stealing his lures? I offer him to check thorugh my stuff but he insistant that i took it. Now, i have well over 100 bags of plastics and really have no use for 2 more at this point and i stress this too him. Well finnally i lose it, i'm nothing if i'm not a man of honor. Everyone who knows me knows i would never steal. Well i came just short of cracking him and now a freindship is ruined, and a fishing buddy is lost.

In the end, i'm the A-hole for losing my temper. My question to you hawkers is, should i have a clear concious about this? How would you react to this, besides lookin for a fishing buddy who isnt a charity case?

P.S.
I outfished him at least 3 to 1 lol

Post by **Trophymuskie** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:46 pm

Don't worry about it he's not worth it. I've gone through worse with someone I thought of as a brother, took care of him for years and the knife in my back was totally unexpected.

Hope you find yourself a great fishing partner.

I strongly believe in carma, what goes around comes around.

Post by **PerchPredator** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:50 pm

Good question Mudpout. I'm not a psychiatrist or anything, and by no means do I pretend to know exactly what happened, but I think it's possible that you freaked out on him so bad because you supported him for so long and never said a thing.

You more than likely provided all that food and fishing and fun and everything for him as a friend, never expecting or wanting even a thank you. But when you got accusations of theft that was the one last thing you ever expected.

Add that and the fact that he wouldnt drop it and take your word over it made the situation worse. I mean friends should trust and believe other friends. If my buddy tells me that he didn't take my bait or anything else then that means he didn't take it.

so yeah, I for sure would've reacted exactly the same as you. Sucks that it happened, but I hope it all works out.

Post by **Mudpout** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:51 pm

Thanks for the words of wisdom. I definatly feel stabbed in the back. I also wonder if its just a big difference in cultures, me being the country boy and him being a city boy. Seems to me where I'm from you call a man a thief you better either run or put em up? Like i told him, you can call me many things and be half right, but a theif i wont take.

Post by **PerchPredator** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:52 pm

The one silver lining may be that you'll have more time for fishing with fellow FH'ers

Post by **Mudpout** » Wed May 19, 2010 3:54 pm

HAHA, love the optimism Mikey!

Post by **Pints** » Wed May 19, 2010 4:52 pm

Sounds more to me that his reaction is that of a person who would have stolen some of your stuff. I think your reaction was normal, lucky he didn't have to swim to shore.

Post by **GuinnessGuy** » Wed May 19, 2010 6:07 pm

You're a better man than me. He would've walked home from there...

You're not the A-hole. you're the victim.

GG

Post by **wolfe** » Wed May 19, 2010 6:47 pm

He will probably feel pretty crappy when he finds those packets of lures...

W.

Post by **Mudpout** » Wed May 19, 2010 7:22 pm

You know what Wolfe, thats the last words i said to him. And i told him that i hope it really burns.

Post by **Joisey Joe** » Wed May 19, 2010 9:23 pm

I have no problem with the way you reacted, if this jerk was a real fishin bud he wud have been of a different temperment and remembered how he was treated when he was down on his luck. So for 2 stupid bags of plastic he lost a bud and a ride, seems he's the one that shud be asking himself this question! Joe.

Post by **MTF** » Thu May 20, 2010 7:54 am

WOW...the nerve of some people. I think you reacted totally within your rights....If it was me I think I would have given him one more free thing as a parting gift.....swimming lessons

He is the one that should be feeling like a heel right now, not you.

Post by **plncrzy** » Thu May 20, 2010 8:07 am

Its Tough dealing with people who are totally unreasonable... some people are just not capable of seeing things for what they are... sometimes temporarily, sometimes rarely, sometimes often, for some... all the time.

There are many mental illnesses out there that go unchecked. I have a brother who is schizophrenic... try reasoning with him sometimes

I think a lot of people have varying degrees of mental illness and sometimes it comes out and sometimes not... so you think you might know somebody for a long time... and then something happens... something that is totally out of character.... you wonder WTF? ... should you judge that person for that one episode?

What I have done in the past is determined how often these episodes occur and whether or not I can deal with it..... if the answer is NOT... then a very high barrier goes up between me and that person.... You know this person best... you know if you should/can overlook this incident... Its up to you to decide.

Post by **Mudpout** » Thu May 20, 2010 8:22 am

Plncrzy, That is some really sound advice. Thank you, and thanks to all the other hawkers who replied, you've really helped clear my concience. This was tottaly out of character for him, i think my strong reaction was fueled by being so surprised. Like i had to ask the guy five times before i even beleived what was happening. I talked to his cousin about it and it turns out the day before we went fishing he had suspected his own cousin of stealing cigarettes. I always figered the guy was just a little slow, not retarded, just slow. Now like Plncrzy says, there must be an underlying factor. But it's too late for me to give a crap! FISH ON MY FRIENDS!

Post by **cprince** » Thu May 20, 2010 8:32 am

I think I've got it!!!

He smoked the grubs and used the cigarettes on a wide gaped hook Carolina rigged!!

All kidding aside... Both my brothers are like that to varying degrees. Not easy. I have asked my parents on many occasions if they were brother and sister... you know... cousin daddy and aunt mom...

Maybe that is why I moved to a rural community.

Craig